Saturday, July 25, 2009

Lessons to be learned from Pac-10 Schools


Arizona: It’s all relative, just because your neighbor sucks, doesn’t mean you are good! Who hasn’t heard an Arizona fan bash ASU and their JC status? But… isn’t UofA where a lot of kids from California go once they get rejected from a respectable UC? Not so GREAT now are we? If that’s not enough, they are the only school in the conference to never make it to a Rose Bowl (they joined the PAC in 1978).

ASU: Be an accepting human being! According to Yahoo!’s education section, ASU’s most recent admission rate on shows over 80% of applicants got accepted! Yay!

Cal: Just because you are the older brother doesn’t mean everyone wants you and that you are better! A common fact Cal alums/fans love to say is how they go to the greatest public school and UC ever. Well, if it is so great, how is it that it gets over 10,000 less applicants annually compared to “little brother” UCLA? Not to mention their claim at athletic “success”. When was the last time they played in Pasadena in January or won the NCAA basketball tournament? That’s right, half a century ago (that means fifty years for you Trojans readers). Smaller sports “success”? They are well behind UCLA, Stanford, and U$C in NC’s (about 50+ less than the U$C).How about academically? Well, they have an amazing engineering program, but other than that nothing is that much better than their public rivals. Oh, and how is it that their admittance rate is higher than UCLA’s over the past decade? Hmm… not so “golden” are we Bears?

Oregon: Love all your children and mentees because one day one will make you rich! If there is one really good thing UO has going for itself is having millions (if not more) rolling to the school from uber-rich alum Phil Knight. The downside to having essentially one very influential alum? He makes you wear really awkward ugly uniforms.

Oregon State: Never name anything that is remotely close to a sexual innuendo! It is pretty safe to say when most people think of OSU, they think about their mascot, the Beaver. Do you want to go through life being closely tied to something that also represents a reproductive organ?

Stanford: Money does not equal to success (or love)! Sure, Stanford’s athletic program has the 2nd most NCAA NC’s but they have been around since the mid 1800’s. If Stanford wants a new stadium or facility it will get it, and soon. Has any other school built a brand new stadium in 9 months? Well, only if the fans took notice and bothered showing up to watch a game…

USC: As long as you know the right people, you can break the rules all you want! Let’s see, they have been involved in endless cheating scandals, arrests, dirty money resources for athletes, and have never really been punished. If I was to elaborate, it will take about half my day, sorry.

Washington: If possible, stay at home! UDub has good teams that do well in general, but it seems like they almost never lose in Seattle. Maybe their fans scare opposing players, maybe the refs, who knows. It is something to take note of.

Washington State: Location, Location, Location! Sure Wazzu has had some nice moments in sports and maybe a couple in academia, but how much better would the school have been off had it not been established in Pullman?

Wait a second, where is UCLA on this list you might ask? Well, I will admit that it is quite difficult to critique my own fine higher education institution, so that’s open ended for anyone who wishes to take a crack at it (I will challenge if needed).

1 comment:

  1. haha...so good and so biased. But I'd love to see a whole post picking apart those pesky Trojans. I mean, you guys are from UCLA.

    Plus, when you mentioned that Standford has the 2nd most NCAA NC's, you forgot to mention that a certain school near and dear to your heart has remained number 1 for years.

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